Do you know about reciprocal motivation? This is when someone does something for us that we feel obliged to do something for them?

I’m reminded of this concept for a couple of reasons. Yesterday I was in a workshop on Positive Psychology and the presented gave a box of chocolates to one of the audience, and then she said that this person had to give the box of chocolates away to someone else between leaving the venue and getting home. This is an example of random acts of kindness and people will do things such as give people a bunch of flowers, buy a ticket for the person behind them in the queue - for cinema, or a coffee etc. 

Back to reciprocal motivation - I have recently received some greetings cards, a broach, a pen and sticky self addressed labels from British Red Cross. To be honest,  I don’t really want any of the things they have sent, but feel obliged to send them a cheque. Possibly this isn’t the best example, as it’s making me feel guilty to send them money and this will no doubt get a much better response than just a letter. 

This relates to self disclosure - when we meet someone new, we share some personal information and depending on what they share back, depends on whether we share more.

So, how can we take this forward? Why not look for a way to do something for someone else - perhaps help them with a work project, offer to do some chores for them and later they are likely to want to do something for you.

Let me know how you get on.