A recent study has found that happy thoughts can stimulate creativity, but for mundane work such as plowing through databases, being cranky or sad can work better.  Stress, anxiety and a bad mood can focus our attention only on what is directly in front of us.  High levels of well being can broaden our thinking and make us more creative.  The research was undertaken by Psychologist Adam Anderson of the University of Toronto who asked 24 university students to take two kinds of test after listening to sad, happy or neutral music.

 In one test, students had to think of unusual words, so testing the breadth of their thinking, in a second test they had to ignore everything except the middle letter in a series of 3 which measured their ability to focus.   In this test, if they had listened to happy music they were 40% more likely to be distracted than if they had listened to said music.

 I’ve received this from a client, and I think it sums up well the importance of valuing our unique qualities.  

An elderly Chinese woman had two large pots, each hung on the ends of a pole, which she carried across her neck. One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water, at the end of the long walk from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only half full. For a full two years this went on daily, with the woman bringing home only one and a half pots of water.  Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments.  But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it could only do half of what it had been made to do.

After 2 years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the woman one day by the stream. “I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your house.” The old woman smiled, “Did you notice that there are flowers on your side of the path, but not on the other pot’s side?” “That’s because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them.  For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate the table.  Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace the house.”Each of us has our own unique flaw.  But it’s the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding. You’ve just got to take each person for what they are and look for the good in them.

SO, to all of my crackpot friends, have a great day and remember to smell the flowers on your side of the path!

Many people find it difficult to say “yes” to something new. Now obviously you don’t want to say yes to everything, but sometimes people wish they hadn’t rushed into the reasons why not.   The reason people don’t want to say yes is often a fear of the unknown, and not wanting to commit. With my career coaching clients we will often use the MBTI (Myers Briggs Type Indicator) and from this we identify some people as being more introverted. These people need to take time to weigh things up, to consider the options and this can mean that they miss out. So what can help you to say yes?

• Don’t listen to the voice in your head that says “No”.  See a “STOP” sign so you don’t focus on all the reasons why not
• Remeber the time you said YES and the results were fantastic.  you could either have some photos as a reminder or visualise the fantastic results in your mind.
• Say YES in a positive and upbeat voice – it will increase your positive feelings and help you to get excited for what is coming up.

Why not give this a try?

In the New Statesman, 4th December, I read a very interesting article “In praise of the ordinary child” by Viv Groskop. She was writing about some research undertaken by Dr Carol Dweck, psychology professor at Stanford who has recently studied a group of 11 year olds, (Generation Zero). She discovered that the parents of most of these children have been told from birth that they were extremely clever. I’ve always thought it a good thing to tell my children that they are beautiful, but telling them they are bright, can mean that they stop making an effort. Why do they need to? They have nothing to prove. What she found was the children who were regularly praised chose easy tests which they knew they would score highly, and rated effort as sad. This meant that they were not doing as well as they might in tsts as they didn’t botheer to try. We all need to understand that we are in charge of our own intellectual growth and recognising that we do need to try and persevere gives us a more balanced view of ourself – true self esteem. Does this interest you? You can read more here: http://www.newstatesman.com/200612040024

In the newspaper yesterday I read that doctors, teachers and other public sector workers are being treated for mental illness because of the “bureaucratic blame culture” in their working lives.  Dr Cantopher, a Consultant Psychiatrist at the Priory Hospital said that 20 years ago most of his pateints were business leaders, but now the majority are civil servants.   He said that when mistakes were made by public servants there was usually an enquiry and the identification of a scapegoat.  

(reprinted from previous blog in November)